I have endured several…I’ll just call them “debates” about whether or not you can love others if you don’t love yourself, and I’ve heard  people make some pretty ridiculous arguments in support of  both sides of this question.  I have spent countless hours listening to messages and reading books about the wretched status of the human heart,  yet how we are supposed to love everyone as God loves us.  Endless “checklists” have been compiled by so many different flavors of religion, outlining the parameters we are to use in judgement of whether or not someone is worthy of love.  However, if I use that same list to measure myself, I come up horrifically short of hitting the mark.

Thus, the dilemma…

…how can I love myself, or anyone else, when I constantly focus on how ugly I am?

I recently read an excellent analogy that helps answer my question, “Can I love others when I despise myself?”  For years people understood that smoking tobacco caused harm to the smoker, but after further research they discovered the effects of second-hand smoke.  By poisoning themselves, the smokers are also emitting toxins infecting all of those around them.  When I constantly remind myself of how unlovable I am, how can I possibly overflow with anything other than disgust and disdain?  In order to truly love other people, I must fully comprehend how lovable I am.

Oh my goodness.  Just typing that brings tears to my eyes…

I AM WORTHY OF LOVE AND BELONGING!

I WILL BELIEVE THAT,

and my life will no longer be driven by  iniquitous, self-deprecating expectations but by a desire to authentically love God, myself and others with a whole heart based solely on the fact that we are all made in the image of our creator who is, himself, the very personification of love.   I do not need a checklist to determine my own or anyone else’s value.  If I breathe in the pure, unadulterated breath of God, I truly believe I will thrive and will, in turn, love everyone around me.