So basically my life ceases to exist during the month of December. I work at the Post Office and from Thanksgiving until New Year’s Day I eat, sleep and breath mail and parcels six-seven days per week, 12-14 hours per day. Blogging is a pipe dream during this time, and if I did write something, it would probably make you question my sanity…and maybe cause you to fear going to the post office!
However, now that I am wading out of the postal blue fog, it might be time to think about goals for 2017. I can’t really say that I am “resolving” to do anything, because as soon as I say, “I WILL,” then my rebellious inner 2 year old throws herself on the ground, kicks and screams and refuses to be moved. Thus, I will merely set a goal and encourage my psyche to get on board with the desires of my heart.
As I go about the mindless work of sorting parcels, I tend to disassociate and think deep thoughts about life and dreams and hopes and aspirations. The more I’ve ruminated on my vision for 2017, the more I’ve realized my intentions boil down into one ultimate ambition:
LOVE MORE
During the next trip around the sun, I long to burrow deep into my relationship with my God. I want to learn nuances of His character I’ve not experienced before, feeling Him close to me in every moment, not just when I choose to tune my brain in to the Jesus channel. I want every breath to become a spiritual awareness, full of gratitude and wonder and awe.
As a result of my increased awareness and experience of my Creator, I long for authentic, vulnerable, genuine relationships with the people I encounter in 2017. I yearn to listen fully and with an open mind and heart, not just for the purpose of interjecting my “wisdom,” but to truly empathize and understand. More than anything, I want my MIND to silently speak the words my heart knows are kind and loving and true. I so wish to interact with my family, friends, coworkers, and even one-time, chance encounters in such a way that there is no question on their part or on mine that I honestly care about them.
And finally, I desire to love myself more and more; to forgive myself fully for human fallacies, to appreciate my talents and gifts, to grant myself the freedom to TRY regardless of my fear, and to slay, not the symptoms of my inner battles, but the lifelong lies that have tortured my entire existence.
If my mission for 2017 also results in less debt, firmer abs and tight glutes… well, I’m okay with that, too! Love comes in all sorts of packaging, and I’m open to all of it.
